Queen Nancy

Once upon a time there was a Queen named Nancy. She was the Speaker of the House of Representatives, therefore the most powerful and highest-ranking female politician in the land. After the 2018 elections when Democrats took over the House, she had the unenviable task of herding cats. There were many new representatives from all walks of life: more female than ever and more racially and religiously diverse than ever. They also varied greatly in how progressive they were. 

She had to make one of the most consequential decisions she would ever face: whether or not to allow hearings to begin the process of impeaching King Orange. A very sizeable number of representatives were pushing her to do so. For though he was a self-appointed King, he still swore an oath to the Constitution. As King Orange’s impeachable offenses piled up, the call became louder. 

However, Queen Nancy was hesitant to go in that direction. She thought that it might hurt several members’ reelection chances in 2020, especially in the Red States that went for King Orange. It could also give King Orange what he wanted: fire up his key supporters. It could be a rallying cry. Instead, she wanted the House to focus on issues, and begin investigations into potential wrongdoing. Winning in 2020—the House, Senate, and Presidency—was crucial. She didn’t want to blow it. 

It was quite possible that the House could multitask though. Nancy was a master politician and would see to that. 

Then one day it happened. Queen Nancy gave the go-ahead to begin impeachment proceedings. What happened? A whistleblower filed a complaint that King Orange had pressured the President of the Ukraine to give him dirt on Viscount Handsy in exchange for aid. One by one representatives that had been on the fence about impeachment agreed that King Orange needed to be removed. Yet King Orange continued to insist with a flurry of tweets that it was all a “witch hunt.” 

Only a powerful woman could drive King Orange further into madness. He was cornered, and he knew it.

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